At what point should I give up?

Take your time, and evaluate your situation. 

If you are uncertain as to whether you want to separate and you are not in a situation where your personal safety requires an immediate exit from the relationship and home, consider taking your time and really working through these thoughts and feelings first.  Separating and divorcing are big decisions that have serious legal, financial, emotional, and practical consequences.  If you run from one unhappy situation thinking that alone will make you happy, you may find you were wrong.  It is advisable to really unpack your beliefs and work on your mindset to learn to be at peace in your current situation before you go about changing it, or your old problems may follow you to the new situation.

Of course, in a domestic violence situation, personal safety comes first and immediate action should be taken to preserve that. If you have children and are unsure of their safety, you must also make their safety and well-being a priority!

Make sure you are safe at all times. Your safety and well-being is most important!

If you’re afraid, it may be a good idea to contact your local police department ahead of time and ask to speak to someone that can advise you, and be there for you when the time comes. It may be helpful if they know what to expect – before a situation escalates. They can also assist you with assistive services and getting a restraining order in a worst-case scenario, which I sincerely hope will not happen to you!

If you decide to divorce, it is best to have a plan about what at least the first few months of separation will look like in terms of your housing, financial resources, and parenting time with your kids.


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Lauren Fair Coaching

I have been a divorce attorney for the past 12 years, running a highly successful boutique family law firm in Southern California. In addition to being a legal expert on divorce, I went through my own devastating divorce and re-built a life I love. Wherever you are on your divorce journey, I have either been there myself or helped clients who have been there.
Lauren Fair Coaching
Lauren Fair Coaching3 days ago
Whether you are going through a divorce or not, deciding, and then taking the time, to take care of yourself is essential.

I was definitely guilty of not taking care of myself for a long time. I put my clients, business, and others before me. For way too long. And I burned out big time before I realized I could not continue to put everyone and everything else before my own needs. I intelligently knew this before, but could not get myself out of the default hustle cycle and overwhelm it felt like I was drowning in. It took the forced slow-down of the pandemic lockdown for me to have the space to really feel in my bones the paramount need to prioritize caring for myself.

When you think of self-care, you may think of things like taking a bubble bath, going to the spa, reading a book on the beach, sleeping in, taking a walk, or having lunch with a friend.

These things are all AMAZING and if they feel fun and relaxing to you, you should totally do them. I do.

But, the most impactful act of self-care I have done was to hire a life coach. Getting coached every week is the single most important activity I have done that has enabled me to change my life so significantly. I empty out the thoughts in my brain like dumping purse contents out on a table, we look at them together, my coach helps me see what I am missing and what is possible, and we access my inner wisdom to strategize how to solve problems and move forward with and achieve my life and business goals.

The gift of a managed mind and having someone to point out my blind spots and offer new possibilities and perspectives has done more for my overall level of peace, calm, motivation, focus, and joy than any other tactic or activity I’ve tried.

And it’s what allowed me to see how much more I could serve my clients in the divorce space with these tools.

Do I still have bad days and negative emotions? Of course! Because, well, I have a human brain. But the coaching I receive and the self-coaching I do make all the difference in how I handle the good and the bad times for myself. And that, for me, is indispensable self-care. 💗

#divorce #divorcecoach #lifecoach #coaching

Contact Lauren

Contact Lauren